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I am not being defensive. 
                    {My God, he's one of them}

What do you mean, paranoid?
                    {I knew it, and so cute too}

How can I enjoy the game when I don't know what's happening?
                    {Good girl, distract the homicidal maniac}

Well, okay then, tell me what's going on.
                    {I see you looking at me from the corner of
                     your eye}

That's what's called a huddle?
                    {I bet they're talking about me}

The Quarterback calls the hike.
                    {They were talking about me.  I heard him. 
                     36-24-36, blond, second row, center}

He's throwing a pass.
                    {Oh mi-god! They're heading straight for me!}

The referee whistles down the play.
                    {Thank God, I think they're here to help}

He's indicating a penalty for holding.
                    {They're not here to help me, they're going
                     to choke me}

Big crowd here today.
                    {They can't do anything, there are too many
                     witnesses}

Only eleven thousand?  Not that big.
                    {My God, they're all on his side}

Panders to the male psyche.
                    {They're working themselves into a frenzy}

It replaces gladitorial combat?
                    {I've got to get out of here}

Uhm, say, could you get me a soda?

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